Grandma Life

It was in May last year that I last wrote in this blog. I’ve had thoughts, but apart from irregular journal writing, I’ve mainly been adjusting to and assessing this “retired life”.

It has been almost five years since I retired from fulltime paid employment in my chosen career. And while I felt useful in my work, serving the community in a positive way, I am relieved to be away from the relentless and soul-sucking power plays of office politics.

In these past five years I have done things I have wanted to do: travelled Australia; “finished” and printed our family history; organised the family photos; wrote a short story of fiction; and walked in some beautiful places.

So many life goals and achievements are behind me now: getting married (still married for 41 years now); enjoying 20 years nurturing three children into adulthood; achieving two degrees and one Masters; designed four houses we built and lived in; travelled Australia; visited London, Paris, as well as other gorgeous parts of western Europe; competed in many events swimming, cycling, and running; trekked many mountains in Australia and the Overland Track in Tasmania; and fed my creative urges through writing, drawing, painting, photography, and playing the piano.

Now my hip is sore, and I feel my age. But I value this Grandma Life – #grandmalife. I cherish the memories I hold of my own grandparents, especially the women. I loved being in their company, soaking up the warmth, endless cups of tea, stories, and love.

It seems to me that era of basic warm circles of women is undervalued in today’s society. Who even makes tea in a pot anymore? Well, me, but … Apart from the tea-making, I hope I show my own two little granddaughters the value of this warm, quiet, cherishing, in the same way I experienced.

Still life sketch with teapot by SuesBent 2023

These days with most of my life behind me, I gladly put the “GO-GO-GO” lifestyle aside. I try to live in the beauty of a slow life – #beautifulslowlife. I enjoy the YouTube videos of The Cottage Fairy and try to soak up her slow rhythm and appreciation of small pleasures. (Although her life is about to change in a profound way with a baby on the way). I still listen to Rich Roll and enjoy his considered and in-depth conversations, although the testosterone levels can be a bit much at times.

I love regular dips in the clear green waters of Port Phillip Bay and this visceral experience always reminds me of the dips I have loved in this bay since first learning to swim as a child.

Cooking is always something I’ve loved and it’s great to have time to spend in the kitchen making healthy and nourishing meals for my husband and me.

I continue to feed my creativity with writing, painting, and piano playing. I walk and I will return to daily yoga when my hip feels better. I may have strained it doing pigeon pose with Adriene recently. Or perhaps when I trekked up to the top of Genoa Peak recently.

I read and log my journey on GoodReads. I reached my target of 50 books last year for the first time in the past eleven years. This year though I will relax and let my reading journey unravel as it will. So far, I have loved Wifedom by Anna Funder, Question 7 by Richard Flanagan, and A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles.

I continue to study things that interest me, so I will see what is available on Future Learn. I do lessons in the French language every day. I am also working through the daily lessons of A Course in Miracles, as well as watching some discussion online about this text. Many years ago, I attended a presentation in Melbourne where Marianne Williamson talked about A Course in Miracles. It was intense and spellbinding. Now she is a candidate for President of the US. Now there is someone who has never slowed down.

Reading as a writer

So far this year I have not been writing anything of significance. I am in a lull between projects – and ideas. However I have been doing a lot more reading than I have done in the past, and I find I am reading like a writer.

Inspired by Benjamin McEvoy I wanted to expand and enrich my reading, and after watching his videos and taking notes I felt daunted by the prospect of a year’s worth of reading The Classics.

So, I looked at the award winners at the Booker Prize, the Miles Franklin Award, and others. I noted some of these titles on my “want to read” list. On closer inspection, some of these stories I find uninspiring and not what I want to read at all. Sometimes I will push through. I read the award winning Honeybee by Craig Silvey and gave it three stars, but I don’t think I am the target audience for that story.

Goodreads is a great tool for managing your own reading journey and since 2013 I have challenged myself with a target of reading 50 books each year. So far, I have failed every year. Of course I only include books that I have read from start to finish. I don’t list books I do not finish, or books I just skim. (In the past I used Library Thing).

This year though I have started well as I certainly have more time in this retired life, but also I am reading in an attempt to see how these books are crafted. I read on a more analytical level, noticing how the story arc is told, how the characters come to life, conversations, what the story is actually about, and how it evokes feeling and imagery.

So far I have finished 12 books this year. The last story I read was Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin. I loved it and gave it 5 stars on Goodreads. I am currently reading The Woman in the Library by Sulari Gentill and this book is a great example to would-be writers. While the story unfolds, we are shown three levels of how this story is being created. First from the main character and her friends, then in correspondence between the fictional author and a trusted friend and fellow writer, and then as the actual creator of the story. It is thoroughly engaging especially for other writers.

I have just added a page of contents to my blog Sues Bent, because with 15 years of blog posts I wanted to make it more accessible.

It is no surprise that when I look at my tag cloud I see that the main topics I write about are: books, reading, creativity, writing, libraries, learning, technology and lifestyle.

I have looked back through these posts knowing that I have written about ‘reading’ from different perspectives over these years, especially in my work as a librarian. The ones that stand out to me are these:

Meanwhile this retired life allows me the time to do all of those things I struggled to find time to do when I was working. I can write, read, practice French, play my piano, knit, play with my granddaughters, sketch, paint, walk, listen to music and podcasts, swim regularly, do yoga each morning, cycle occasionally, try new cooking recipes, archive the old family photos, and catch up with friends. It is amazing how quickly the day passes, and I find I still haven’t done all of the things I planned for that day.

Review of 2022

It is good to look back upon the year that was. This retired life is often free from milestones, goals, and ambition, and we often forget all that we have done.

  • This year I committed to weekly swimming at the local pool YAWA, and I stayed true to that, swimming about 1600 metres each time.
  • I walked regularly and did yoga at home in the mornings.
  • I continued to listen to the Rich Roll podcast, sometimes listening as I walked, and also often tuning in to the YouTube version. He has been consistently providing these interesting interviews for ten years now and I have listened to every episode. While I used to tune in during my commutes to and from work, now I have to make time in order to listen.
  • I have been practicing the French language using the Duolingo language app.
  • I joined the Peninsula Writers Club and while I have not attended many meetings, I did enjoy the workshops that I went to.
  • I wrote a work of historical fiction, and my autobiography to the present year. These were both great exercises for me to complete and my writing apprenticeship has broadened.
  • I read 32 books of the 50 book Reading Challenge I set for myself on Goodreads. My favourite piece of fiction was Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus. My favourite piece of non-fiction was A Place in the World: Finding the Meaning of Home by Frances Mayes.
  • Time spent with my granddaughters was a lot of fun. Together we swam, cycled, drew, painted, cooked, played games, and enjoyed watching Bluey.
  • My husband and I had our DNA tests completed with Ancestry, and this confirmed my research into our family history.
  • The coronavirus pandemic is still circulating unseen.
  • I didn’t practice my piano lessons as often as I planned and hope to do more in 2023.
  • We didn’t go on any trips this year staying close to home.
  • We sold the caravan.
  • We are planning an itinerary for an overseas trip in 2023.
  • As of now I am hopping off social media. I deleted my Twitter account after subscribing in 2007. Instagram annoys me so much now that I can’t bear to be on there for more than a minute. I am not interested in TikTok. Facebook seems to be a necessary evil, but I will try not to post anything. I deleted my Strava account. Of course, I will keep Google and YouTube as these are actually helpful platforms.
Fun with my granddaughters 2022

Zen and the Art of Creative Writing

The things I have written this year are ‘Not For Publication’ (NFP). Am I wasting precious time? I think not. I am practising the art of creative writing and trying to adjust to this lifestyle. I like it. It suits my psyche. I feel like I am in the apprenticeship phase of my writing life, despite the fact of my Earth years.

I have written a short story from a particular incident from my family history. It could be for publication, but is it finished? I am not sure.

I have also written my life story, to get that out of the way and out of my head. Not for publication, but I feel relieved of the burden and the obstacle to a freer creative mind.

My own personal writing process has been revealed to me. I now understand how this energetic force unfurls within me, and then abates with The End, post editing of the Zero Draft.

Writing desk

    I feel well behind when it comes to my skills with crafting the English language. I place blame in part on the negligent curriculum set by Victoria’s Education department during the 1970’s. Grammar was not taught at all, and yet this is an essential tool for being able to express oneself properly, and this leads to effective and genuine communication. This society now converses in memes and acronyms, and we can see how that’s going.

    I favoured math, design, art, science, became an Industrial Designer and left English behind me in secondary school. And yet I have always needed an outlet to express my thoughts and ideas. My main blog is Sues Bent that I began in 2008. While continuing with this blog, I have also written for my side projects such as our big trip around Australia, and my love of French culture.

    Of course, I have written work-related items during my years employed as an Information Professional: reports, media briefs, copy for websites and advertisements, instructional manuals, strategic plans, and created presentations.

    All of this writing over many years has strengthened that muscle. I have put in the ten thousand hours towards mastery (as prescribed by Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers).

    I feel match ready.

    My Self-Initiated Lifelong Learning Experience continues and I draw further learning about the English language and writing from Benjamin McEvoy and his Hardcore Literature teachings. The Writers HQ continues to be a great source for motivation.

    I have my Writing Plan and some ideas for 2023.

    Next month I will write a review of 2022; things accomplished, books read, writing completed, etc. I have done this before, inspired by Chris Guillebeau. It is great way to plan for the year ahead.

    PS The title of this blog post highlights my love of the 1974 book by Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. I wonder if Benjamin McEvoy has a tutorial on this classic novel.

    Those Adverbs!

    I hesitate at the edge, procrastinating, fearful about plunging into the deep, the real work of writing a book. I am surrounded by experts, published authors, stories already told.

    But here I am at the precipice, ready to go deep into the story.

    “Everyone has a book in them.” ~ Stan Smith (my father)

    The preparation is done, and no more time to dally.

    Writers desk at the ready

    I have not been writing in this blog for a while.

    • First there was the travel adventure around Australia where I concentrated my efforts on a bit of travel writing through Mick & Sue’s Aussie Adventure.
    • Then last year I completed the family story and printed that tome for family.
    • During February I have been trying to get my head to the task. I’m not sure that taking part in #FebFlourish on Instagram helped at all, except to add to my procrastination.

    So, my plan now is to:

    • Assign blocks of time for this writing adventure.
    • Go over my notes.
    • Do a bit more planning so I have a structure to write into.
    • Aim for a number of words per session goal.
    • Just start writing and try to get this first draft down.
    • And maybe I should do the online courses offered by WritersHQ.UK
      • Balance Your Writing Life that starts in March
      • Editing 101 that starts in April

    Lockdown Life

    Since we have returned to “normal” life, after our adventures, we have been in lockdown with the rest of Melbourne and Victoria. My husband misses his weekly golf games with his mates and looks forward to when he can do that again. I am quite happy and occupied at home. We are both fully vaccinated.

    Images during lockdown life 2021

    These are some of the things I have been doing:

    • Family History Research

    After decades of saving bits of information, stories, and photographs, I am finally compiling it all and see an end in sight. A bonus has been the remote access to the Ancestry Database. This has allowed me to fill in lots of gaps and extend my tree.

    So far, I have found 22 ships that our ancestors arrived on, mostly from England, Ireland, and Scotland, one American, and one German. Three convicts on my side and one convict on my husband’s side.

    Some of the ships my ancestors arrived on emigrating to Australia

    I have one mystery that I cannot solve, and he is a key ancestor. I have found him in England and found him in Australia, but I don’t know when he arrived exactly somewhere between 1851 and August 1853. Perhaps there is a major misspelling somewhere that has not translated well into the digital files.

    The excellent course I completed online through Future Learn has added a richer dimension to my research. I know what I am doing. Genealogy: Researching Your Family Tree, Future Learn UK.

    • Exercise
      • Walking within the five-kilometre restriction. This can include a solid upward walk with views of the bay. Logging these on Strava gives an added interest.
      • Cycling along the foreshore track now and then.
      • Unfortunately swimming at the local pool is not allowed at the moment. We look forward to when we can go back there regularly.
    • Creating
      • I finished an oil painting that I had on my easel for too long. Marg’s elephant at Salvia Court. And started a new painting.
      • Cooking lots of yummy food that we then have to share between the two of us. Cheesecake, Lemon Meringue Pie, Apricot Sour Cream Tart. Practicing for when our family can get together once again.
      • I practice playing my piano occasionally.
    • Media consumption
      • Reading The Fatal Shore by Robert Hughes. His interpretation of those early years offers only stories of flawed humans, on all sides of the equation, trying to survive on this Earth. There are no heroes in this tale.

    Searching for Phosphorescence

    Phosphorescence by Julia Baird explores ideas around the things that can lift us when life gets us down.

    She begins poetically with the enchanting existence of phosphorescence in the natural world. I loved her descriptions of lit-up underwater creatures and this drew me in.

    Julia goes on to talk about people who seek the deeper beauty that exists in this world: storm-chasers, divers, forest bathers, silence seekers, tree huggers, cloud appreciators. I relate to these ideas as here she validates my own deeper yearnings and life pursuits.

    With my smartphone handy I enjoyed looking up more information about the people and ideas Julia mentions: Nick Moir, Robert Hoge, and others.

    Julia touches on feminism and her own indecision about using her hard-earned title of ‘Dr.’. Her ideas on ‘lookism’ I appreciate and needs more exploration generally.

    My interest waned a little when she discusses religion but given where she was in her own precarious battle with cancer, I understand.

    Returning to the initial ideas of searching for phosphorescence in the underwater world was a nice way to close the book and reignited my own sense of wonder.

    Books read in 2019

    I read 26 books this year of my personal challenge of 50 books. Of those 18 are fiction and 8 are non-fiction. Books Read 2019-12-27 103509

    These are the books that I read and enjoyed in 2019 with my rating – three I rated 5 star:

    1. The 5AM Club by Robin Sharma – Fiction – 4 stars
    2. The Rain Watcher by Tatiana de Rosnay – Fiction – 4 stars
    3. The Library Book by Susan Orlean – Non-Fiction – 5 stars
    4. The Greenprint by Marco Borges – Non-Fiction – 4 stars
    5. Attitudes of Gratitude by M.J. Ryan – Non-Fiction – 3 stars
    6. Wormwood Mire by Judith Russell – Junior Fiction – 4 stars
    7. Two Steps Forward by Graeme Simsion – Fiction – 3 stars
    8. The Strawberry Thief by Joanne Harris – Fiction – 5 stars
    9. The Book of Dreams by Nina George – Fiction – 3 stars
    10. My Life After Death by Erik Medhus – Non-Fiction – 2 stars
    11. Wanderlust by Jeff Krasno – Non-Fiction – 3 stars
    12. Vanlife Diaries by Kathleen Morton – Non-Fiction – 2 stars
    13. State of Fear by Tim Ayliffe – Fiction – 3 stars
    14. Writing Your Life by Patti Miller – Non-Fiction – 5 stars
    15. Artemis by Andyd Weir – Fiction – 3 stars
    16. City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert – Fiction – 4 stars
    17. Eucalyptus by Murray Bail – Fiction – 4 stars
    18. Everything is F*cked by Mark Manson – Non-Fiction – 4 stars
    19. The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart by Holly Ringland – Fiction – 4 stars
    20. The Rembrandt Affair by Daniel Silva – Fiction – 3 stars
    21. The English Girl by Daniel Silva – Fiction – 3 stars
    22. Bruny by Heather Rose – Fiction – 4 stars
    23. The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd – Fiction – 4 stars
    24. Homeland by Barbara Kingsolver – Fiction – 3 stars
    25. The End of the Ocean by Maja Lunde – Fiction – 3 stars
    26. The Night Ferry by Michael Robotham – Fiction – 3 stars

    I am yet to reach my goal of 50 books in one year. Here is my record from Goodreads over the past few years:

    IMG_1386[1943]

    What is a Library?

    The father of library science, Dr. S. R. Ranganathan, defines the term ‘library’:

    “A library is a public institution or establishment charged with the care of a collection of books and the duty of making them accessible to those who require to use them and the task of converting every person in its neighbourhood into a habitual library goer and a regular reader.”

    Oxford defines a ‘library’:

    “A building or room containing collections of books, periodicals, and sometimes films and recorded music for the use or borrowing by the public or the members of an institution.”

    Cambridge definition:

    “A building, room, or organization that has a collection, especially of books for people to read or borrow, usually without payment.”

    Wikipedia definition:

    “A library is a curated collection of sources of information and similar resources, selected by experts and made accessible to a defined community for reference or borrowing. It provides physical or digital access to material and may be a physical location or a virtual space, or both.”

    Nowhere are the words ‘programs’, ‘events’, ‘performance’, ‘show’, or ‘hub’ mentioned.

    It is a sad day when a library collection is being arbitrarily shoved aside to make room for random artists to show-off. And these significant decisions are being made not by ‘experts’. Not by Library Professionals. Not by the people who are educated and qualified and comprehensively appreciate the importance of a properly functioning library with an appropriately curated collection.

    A Library is not a hall, or a meeting place, or an auditorium. It is not a place where individuals ‘perform’. That is a different place: maybe an Arts Centre, or a public hall.

    In trying to reinvent themselves to assure a slice of public funding, public libraries have done a disservice in trying to be all things to all people. Basic storytime has morphed into miked-up performance to a large crowd expecting a ‘show’. While you can’t deny the popularity of storytime sessions in every public library across the nation, it has raised the expectation to put on a show for every single event, week, cause, and celebration.

    Science Week becomes an opportunity for a Science Show complete with explosions. Children’s Book Week invites character dress-ups, but also another “show” based on the theme.

    These examples are relevant in the library space, but now “they” expect this every week for every random idea or theme. Libraries exist on the premise of inclusivity. But where are the ‘collections’ in all of this? Where are the books? Where are the spaces for investigation, learning, study, and contemplation? Where is the avenue for the Self-Initiated Lifelong Learning Experiences?

    I don’t believe all people are lazy and mindless and willing to sit back and be delivered an idea through a performance. All people are creative and wish to activate their own thing.

    I believe libraries need to focus on the very core definition of a ‘library’ in order to reinvent themselves, and not accept the current coercion that reduces the library to a day centre, performance space, community hub, and marketing opportunity.

    I am a book lover and perpetually curious about this life. I love to read and investigate. I can do some of that online, but I also like to delve into a physical book, being unplugged, sitting under a tree, holding the book in my hand, turning the pages, absorbed in the unfolding story. This story inevitably leads to further investigation and more reading resources as I delve and learn further.

    Public libraries need help from everyone as public funds are being redirected and usurped into other areas by people not qualified, or educated to understand the elemental and crucial function of a ‘Library’. If there are no books, regardless of the format, it is NOT a library!

    Me and many other Library Professionals like me have worked hard and conscientiously for libraries for many years, but I fear that public libraries won’t be there when I am retired and looking for a good book to borrow.

    Public Libraries RIP.

     

    Books Read in 2018

    Here is the list of books that I read in 2018 with my ratings.

    goodreads_challenge_2018_pic03

    FICTION

    1. The Shepherd’s Hut by Tim Winton – 5 stars
    2. Bridge of Clay by Markus Zusak – 5 stars
    3. The Little Paris Bookshop by Nina George – 4 stars
    4. Black Rock White City by A.S. Patric – 3 stars
    5. Hector and the Search for Happiness by Francois Lelord – 3 stars
    6. The Vegetarian by Han Kang – 3 stars
    7. My Absolute Darling by Gabriel Tallent – 3 stars
    8. The Quiet Side of Passion by Alexander McCall Smith – 3 stars
    9. The Other Wife by Michael Robotham – 3 stars
    10. The Nowhere Child by Christian White – 3 stars
    11. The Little French Bistro by Nina George – 3 stars
    12. Close Your Eyes by Michael Robotham 2 stars
    13. Six Years by Harlan Coben – 2 stars
    14. The Lucky Galah by Tracy Sorensen – 2 stars
    15. Scrublands by Chris Hammer – 2 starsgoodreads_challenge_2018-pic01

    NON-FICTION

    1. Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression and the Unexpected Solutions by Johann Hari – 5 stars
    2. To Shake the Sleeping Self: A Journey from Oregon to Patagonia, and a Quest for a Life with No Regret by Jedidah Jenkins – 5 stars
    3. Staying: A Memoir by Jessie Cole – 5 stars
    4. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson – 4 stars
    5. The Plant-Based Solution: A Vegan Cardiologist’s Plan to Save Your Life and the Planet by Joel K. Kahn – 4 stars
    6. The Great Spring: Writing, Zen, and This Zigzag Life by Natalie Goldberg – 4 stars
    7. The Hidden School: Return of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman – 4 stars
    8. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organising by Marie Kondo – 4 stars
    9. The Alzheimer’s Solution: A Revolutionary Guide to How You Can Prevent and Reverse Memory Loss by Dean Sherzai – 4 stars
    10. Shining: The Story of a Lucky Man by Abdi Aden – 4 stars
    11. Random Life by Judy Horacek – 3 stars
    12. 8 Keys to Forgiveness by Robert Enright – 3 stars
    13. Living as a River: Finding Fearlessness in the Face of Change by Bodhipaksa – 3 stars
    14. The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi – 3 stars
    15. Eat Pray Love Made Me Do It: Life Journeys Inspired by the Best-selling Memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert – 3 stars
    16. 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works by Dan Harris – 3 stars
    17. The Longevity Diet: Discover the New Science Behind Stem Cell Activation and Regeneration to Slow Aging, Fight Disease, and Optimize Weight by Valter Longo – 3 stars
    18. Lovelands by Debra Campbell – 3 stars
    19. Unequaled: Tips for Building a Successful Career Through Emotional Intelligence by James A. Runde – 3 stars
    20. Eat to Live: The Revolutionary Formula for Fast and Sustained Weight Loss by Joel Fuhrman M.D. – 3 stars
    21. The Vegan Starter Kit by Neal D. Barnard – 3 stars
    22. OMD: Swap One Meal a Day to Save the Planet and Your Health by Suzy Amis Cameron – 3 stars
    23. Marcia Langton: Welcome to Country by Marcia Langton – 1 stargoodreads_challenge_2018-pic02