Grandma Life

It was in May last year that I last wrote in this blog. I’ve had thoughts, but apart from irregular journal writing, I’ve mainly been adjusting to and assessing this “retired life”.

It has been almost five years since I retired from fulltime paid employment in my chosen career. And while I felt useful in my work, serving the community in a positive way, I am relieved to be away from the relentless and soul-sucking power plays of office politics.

In these past five years I have done things I have wanted to do: travelled Australia; “finished” and printed our family history; organised the family photos; wrote a short story of fiction; and walked in some beautiful places.

So many life goals and achievements are behind me now: getting married (still married for 41 years now); enjoying 20 years nurturing three children into adulthood; achieving two degrees and one Masters; designed four houses we built and lived in; travelled Australia; visited London, Paris, as well as other gorgeous parts of western Europe; competed in many events swimming, cycling, and running; trekked many mountains in Australia and the Overland Track in Tasmania; and fed my creative urges through writing, drawing, painting, photography, and playing the piano.

Now my hip is sore, and I feel my age. But I value this Grandma Life – #grandmalife. I cherish the memories I hold of my own grandparents, especially the women. I loved being in their company, soaking up the warmth, endless cups of tea, stories, and love.

It seems to me that era of basic warm circles of women is undervalued in today’s society. Who even makes tea in a pot anymore? Well, me, but … Apart from the tea-making, I hope I show my own two little granddaughters the value of this warm, quiet, cherishing, in the same way I experienced.

Still life sketch with teapot by SuesBent 2023

These days with most of my life behind me, I gladly put the “GO-GO-GO” lifestyle aside. I try to live in the beauty of a slow life – #beautifulslowlife. I enjoy the YouTube videos of The Cottage Fairy and try to soak up her slow rhythm and appreciation of small pleasures. (Although her life is about to change in a profound way with a baby on the way). I still listen to Rich Roll and enjoy his considered and in-depth conversations, although the testosterone levels can be a bit much at times.

I love regular dips in the clear green waters of Port Phillip Bay and this visceral experience always reminds me of the dips I have loved in this bay since first learning to swim as a child.

Cooking is always something I’ve loved and it’s great to have time to spend in the kitchen making healthy and nourishing meals for my husband and me.

I continue to feed my creativity with writing, painting, and piano playing. I walk and I will return to daily yoga when my hip feels better. I may have strained it doing pigeon pose with Adriene recently. Or perhaps when I trekked up to the top of Genoa Peak recently.

I read and log my journey on GoodReads. I reached my target of 50 books last year for the first time in the past eleven years. This year though I will relax and let my reading journey unravel as it will. So far, I have loved Wifedom by Anna Funder, Question 7 by Richard Flanagan, and A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles.

I continue to study things that interest me, so I will see what is available on Future Learn. I do lessons in the French language every day. I am also working through the daily lessons of A Course in Miracles, as well as watching some discussion online about this text. Many years ago, I attended a presentation in Melbourne where Marianne Williamson talked about A Course in Miracles. It was intense and spellbinding. Now she is a candidate for President of the US. Now there is someone who has never slowed down.

Learner’s Mind

Some time ago I wrote about a concept I described and labelled SiLLé. It is an acronym that stands for Self-initiated Lifelong Learning experience. It is a behaviour that is grounded in my love of and experience with libraries. It is a habit that fulfills my love of learning, discovery, curiosity, research, and writing.

Yes, I am retired now from paid employment and easily and happily fill my days with listening to podcasts, knitting, walking, cooking, sudoku, crosswords, piano playing, French language lessons, yoga, reading, writing, and art.

But there is space in my ever-curious mind for further expansion. Having “finished” researching and writing the family history, a small work of fiction, and my autobiography, I have floundered for awhile between projects, wondering what would be my next path of enquiry.

I love Future Learn which is a MOOC (Massive Open Online Courses). Many courses are offered for a fee, but others are free. Previously I have completed through this MOOC:

  • Mindfulness and Wellbeing for Peak Performance – Monash University
  • Genealogy: Researching Your Family Tree – University of Strathclyde
  • Start Writing Fiction – Open University
  • Management and Leadership – Open University
  • And now I have just completed studying The Book of Kells – Trinity College Dublin

These explorations feed my brain, lead to further enquiry, and expand my knowledge about this world. I note that if/when I ever visit Ireland I will be sure to go to the exhibition about The Book of Kells at the Trinity College in Dublin. In the meantime I can see this unique and exquisite historical artefact here.

I feel no need to embark on further formal study. I have my Master’s in Information and Library Studies. I am not inspired by the U3A courses available locally. I am content to form my own curriculum; my own SiLLé. What rabbit hole will I disappear down next?

Zen and the Art of Creative Writing

The things I have written this year are ‘Not For Publication’ (NFP). Am I wasting precious time? I think not. I am practising the art of creative writing and trying to adjust to this lifestyle. I like it. It suits my psyche. I feel like I am in the apprenticeship phase of my writing life, despite the fact of my Earth years.

I have written a short story from a particular incident from my family history. It could be for publication, but is it finished? I am not sure.

I have also written my life story, to get that out of the way and out of my head. Not for publication, but I feel relieved of the burden and the obstacle to a freer creative mind.

My own personal writing process has been revealed to me. I now understand how this energetic force unfurls within me, and then abates with The End, post editing of the Zero Draft.

Writing desk

    I feel well behind when it comes to my skills with crafting the English language. I place blame in part on the negligent curriculum set by Victoria’s Education department during the 1970’s. Grammar was not taught at all, and yet this is an essential tool for being able to express oneself properly, and this leads to effective and genuine communication. This society now converses in memes and acronyms, and we can see how that’s going.

    I favoured math, design, art, science, became an Industrial Designer and left English behind me in secondary school. And yet I have always needed an outlet to express my thoughts and ideas. My main blog is Sues Bent that I began in 2008. While continuing with this blog, I have also written for my side projects such as our big trip around Australia, and my love of French culture.

    Of course, I have written work-related items during my years employed as an Information Professional: reports, media briefs, copy for websites and advertisements, instructional manuals, strategic plans, and created presentations.

    All of this writing over many years has strengthened that muscle. I have put in the ten thousand hours towards mastery (as prescribed by Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers).

    I feel match ready.

    My Self-Initiated Lifelong Learning Experience continues and I draw further learning about the English language and writing from Benjamin McEvoy and his Hardcore Literature teachings. The Writers HQ continues to be a great source for motivation.

    I have my Writing Plan and some ideas for 2023.

    Next month I will write a review of 2022; things accomplished, books read, writing completed, etc. I have done this before, inspired by Chris Guillebeau. It is great way to plan for the year ahead.

    PS The title of this blog post highlights my love of the 1974 book by Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. I wonder if Benjamin McEvoy has a tutorial on this classic novel.

    Writer’s Work

    After attending the Writer’s Workshop this month provided by the Peninsula Writers Club and facilitated by author Kate Mildenhall, I have been quietly contemplating… and not much actual writing.

    Group picture – Peninsula Writer’s Club – 7 August 2022

    The workshop on Pitching and Publishing was useful, but more so were the exercises and discussions with all of the writers in the room. It was interesting to hear about the progress of other writer’s projects, successes, and not so successful experiences.

    I felt energised after the event and came home to prepare my own Annual Writing Work Plan. I am great at writing plans: work plans, project plans, communication plans, staff development plans, implementation plans. And I am happy with the personal creative writing plan that I prepared for myself.

    I now have a year’s worth of relevant resources to work through in order to expand and deepen this skill of creative writing. I will list some of them below for reference.

    Kate Mildenhall was an excellent facilitator for this workshop and her former career in the teaching profession was evident. I had already read and enjoyed her historical fiction Skylarking and after this workshop read The Mother Fault. I confessed to her that I could see many similarities between her novel Skylarking and my work-in-progress. We both had identified Anne of Green Gables as a story that was of a similar strain to our own works. So, yes, similarities, but totally different tales.

    My own story sits idle. But I now have an idea about how to develop my story further. The ideas sit inside my head, as the main story did for years before I downloaded it from my brain through my fingers onto paper and computer and wove it into a comprehensible narrative. I am at the point where I need to sit and get these new ideas onto ‘paper’. I will need to prepare a storyboard like I did for the main part of the story, and then plot the scenes and weave the new scenes into the other part of the story that I have already completed. So, while the creative ideas continue to percolate in my head, I write lists of things to do, and read books about writing.

    Here are some resources (in no particular order) that I have incorporated into my Annual Writing Work Plan (some I have read and listened to already*):

    BOOKS ABOUT WRITING

    • Save the Cat! Writes A Novel by Jessica Brody*                                                  
    • The Artists Way by Julia Cameron*
    • The Vein of Gold by Julia Cameron*                                                        
    • Writing Tools: 50 Essential Strategies for Every Writer by Roy Peter Clark *                            
    • Use Your Words: A Myth-Busting, No-Fear Approach to Writing by Catherine Deveny       
    • Everything I Know About Writing by Annie Dillard                                                                              
    • Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert*                                
    • Wild Mind by Natalie Goldberg*                               
    • Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg*                                                   
    • Searching for The Secret River by Kate Grenville                                 
    • Ten Things About Writing: Build Your Story One Word at A Time by Joanne Harris *
    • Night Fishing by Vicki Hastrich                                   
    • On Writing by Stephen King                                                        
    • Steal Like an Artist, Show Your Work, Keep Going by Austin Kleon                                              
    • The Writer Laid Bare by Lee Koffman                                                     
    • Bird by Bird by Ann Lamott                                                          
    • The Cost of Living by Deborah Levy                                                          
    • Before and After the Book Deal by Courtney Maum                                          
    • Writing Your Life by Patti Miller*                                                              
    • How to be an Artist by Jerry Saltz                                                              
    • A Swim in the Pond in the Rain by George Saunders                                                         
    • The Science of Storytelling by Will Storr                                                 
    • The Creative Habit by Twyla Tharp                                                           
    • The Little Red Writing Book by Mark Tredinnick
    • The Luminous Solution by Charlotte Wood                                          
    • The Writer’s Room by Charlotte Wood                                                   
    • How Fiction Works by James Wood         

    PODCASTS

    • Magic Lessons by Elizabeth Gilbert*
    • The First Time by Katherine Collette and Kate Mildenhall
    • The Garret: Writers on Writing by Astrid Edwards             
    • The Writers Room by Charlotte Wood
    • Ruts and Routines by Madeline Dore
    • How to Fail by Elizabeth Day
    • Keeping a Notebook by Nina LaCour
    • Writer’s Routine by Dan Simpson
    • Between the Covers: Conversations with Writers by David Naimon
    • So, You Want to Be a Writer by Valerie Khoo and Vic Writers Centre
    • First Draft: A Dialogue on Writing by Mitzi Rapkin
    • James and Ashley Stay at Home by James Watson and Ashley Blunt          
    • The Screenwriting Life by Meg LeFauve and Lorien McKenna       
    • Dead & Buried by Carly Godden and Lee Hooper*

    SOME OTHER RESOURCES

    Those Adverbs!

    I hesitate at the edge, procrastinating, fearful about plunging into the deep, the real work of writing a book. I am surrounded by experts, published authors, stories already told.

    But here I am at the precipice, ready to go deep into the story.

    “Everyone has a book in them.” ~ Stan Smith (my father)

    The preparation is done, and no more time to dally.

    Writers desk at the ready

    I have not been writing in this blog for a while.

    • First there was the travel adventure around Australia where I concentrated my efforts on a bit of travel writing through Mick & Sue’s Aussie Adventure.
    • Then last year I completed the family story and printed that tome for family.
    • During February I have been trying to get my head to the task. I’m not sure that taking part in #FebFlourish on Instagram helped at all, except to add to my procrastination.

    So, my plan now is to:

    • Assign blocks of time for this writing adventure.
    • Go over my notes.
    • Do a bit more planning so I have a structure to write into.
    • Aim for a number of words per session goal.
    • Just start writing and try to get this first draft down.
    • And maybe I should do the online courses offered by WritersHQ.UK
      • Balance Your Writing Life that starts in March
      • Editing 101 that starts in April

    Lockdown Life

    Since we have returned to “normal” life, after our adventures, we have been in lockdown with the rest of Melbourne and Victoria. My husband misses his weekly golf games with his mates and looks forward to when he can do that again. I am quite happy and occupied at home. We are both fully vaccinated.

    Images during lockdown life 2021

    These are some of the things I have been doing:

    • Family History Research

    After decades of saving bits of information, stories, and photographs, I am finally compiling it all and see an end in sight. A bonus has been the remote access to the Ancestry Database. This has allowed me to fill in lots of gaps and extend my tree.

    So far, I have found 22 ships that our ancestors arrived on, mostly from England, Ireland, and Scotland, one American, and one German. Three convicts on my side and one convict on my husband’s side.

    Some of the ships my ancestors arrived on emigrating to Australia

    I have one mystery that I cannot solve, and he is a key ancestor. I have found him in England and found him in Australia, but I don’t know when he arrived exactly somewhere between 1851 and August 1853. Perhaps there is a major misspelling somewhere that has not translated well into the digital files.

    The excellent course I completed online through Future Learn has added a richer dimension to my research. I know what I am doing. Genealogy: Researching Your Family Tree, Future Learn UK.

    • Exercise
      • Walking within the five-kilometre restriction. This can include a solid upward walk with views of the bay. Logging these on Strava gives an added interest.
      • Cycling along the foreshore track now and then.
      • Unfortunately swimming at the local pool is not allowed at the moment. We look forward to when we can go back there regularly.
    • Creating
      • I finished an oil painting that I had on my easel for too long. Marg’s elephant at Salvia Court. And started a new painting.
      • Cooking lots of yummy food that we then have to share between the two of us. Cheesecake, Lemon Meringue Pie, Apricot Sour Cream Tart. Practicing for when our family can get together once again.
      • I practice playing my piano occasionally.
    • Media consumption
      • Reading The Fatal Shore by Robert Hughes. His interpretation of those early years offers only stories of flawed humans, on all sides of the equation, trying to survive on this Earth. There are no heroes in this tale.

    Writing Practice

    Since leaving my full-time job, I have been concentrating on improving my writing skills.

    IMG_0836

    Here is the list of resources that I have worked through so far:

    My aim from this self-initiated writing course is to improve my writing skill in order to write the first draft of a novel by the end of 2020. I have my idea, characters, location, era, and plot. I have done some research and now I just need to get it out of my head and onto the page.

    What is a Library?

    The father of library science, Dr. S. R. Ranganathan, defines the term ‘library’:

    “A library is a public institution or establishment charged with the care of a collection of books and the duty of making them accessible to those who require to use them and the task of converting every person in its neighbourhood into a habitual library goer and a regular reader.”

    Oxford defines a ‘library’:

    “A building or room containing collections of books, periodicals, and sometimes films and recorded music for the use or borrowing by the public or the members of an institution.”

    Cambridge definition:

    “A building, room, or organization that has a collection, especially of books for people to read or borrow, usually without payment.”

    Wikipedia definition:

    “A library is a curated collection of sources of information and similar resources, selected by experts and made accessible to a defined community for reference or borrowing. It provides physical or digital access to material and may be a physical location or a virtual space, or both.”

    Nowhere are the words ‘programs’, ‘events’, ‘performance’, ‘show’, or ‘hub’ mentioned.

    It is a sad day when a library collection is being arbitrarily shoved aside to make room for random artists to show-off. And these significant decisions are being made not by ‘experts’. Not by Library Professionals. Not by the people who are educated and qualified and comprehensively appreciate the importance of a properly functioning library with an appropriately curated collection.

    A Library is not a hall, or a meeting place, or an auditorium. It is not a place where individuals ‘perform’. That is a different place: maybe an Arts Centre, or a public hall.

    In trying to reinvent themselves to assure a slice of public funding, public libraries have done a disservice in trying to be all things to all people. Basic storytime has morphed into miked-up performance to a large crowd expecting a ‘show’. While you can’t deny the popularity of storytime sessions in every public library across the nation, it has raised the expectation to put on a show for every single event, week, cause, and celebration.

    Science Week becomes an opportunity for a Science Show complete with explosions. Children’s Book Week invites character dress-ups, but also another “show” based on the theme.

    These examples are relevant in the library space, but now “they” expect this every week for every random idea or theme. Libraries exist on the premise of inclusivity. But where are the ‘collections’ in all of this? Where are the books? Where are the spaces for investigation, learning, study, and contemplation? Where is the avenue for the Self-Initiated Lifelong Learning Experiences?

    I don’t believe all people are lazy and mindless and willing to sit back and be delivered an idea through a performance. All people are creative and wish to activate their own thing.

    I believe libraries need to focus on the very core definition of a ‘library’ in order to reinvent themselves, and not accept the current coercion that reduces the library to a day centre, performance space, community hub, and marketing opportunity.

    I am a book lover and perpetually curious about this life. I love to read and investigate. I can do some of that online, but I also like to delve into a physical book, being unplugged, sitting under a tree, holding the book in my hand, turning the pages, absorbed in the unfolding story. This story inevitably leads to further investigation and more reading resources as I delve and learn further.

    Public libraries need help from everyone as public funds are being redirected and usurped into other areas by people not qualified, or educated to understand the elemental and crucial function of a ‘Library’. If there are no books, regardless of the format, it is NOT a library!

    Me and many other Library Professionals like me have worked hard and conscientiously for libraries for many years, but I fear that public libraries won’t be there when I am retired and looking for a good book to borrow.

    Public Libraries RIP.

     

    Books Read in 2018

    Here is the list of books that I read in 2018 with my ratings.

    goodreads_challenge_2018_pic03

    FICTION

    1. The Shepherd’s Hut by Tim Winton – 5 stars
    2. Bridge of Clay by Markus Zusak – 5 stars
    3. The Little Paris Bookshop by Nina George – 4 stars
    4. Black Rock White City by A.S. Patric – 3 stars
    5. Hector and the Search for Happiness by Francois Lelord – 3 stars
    6. The Vegetarian by Han Kang – 3 stars
    7. My Absolute Darling by Gabriel Tallent – 3 stars
    8. The Quiet Side of Passion by Alexander McCall Smith – 3 stars
    9. The Other Wife by Michael Robotham – 3 stars
    10. The Nowhere Child by Christian White – 3 stars
    11. The Little French Bistro by Nina George – 3 stars
    12. Close Your Eyes by Michael Robotham 2 stars
    13. Six Years by Harlan Coben – 2 stars
    14. The Lucky Galah by Tracy Sorensen – 2 stars
    15. Scrublands by Chris Hammer – 2 starsgoodreads_challenge_2018-pic01

    NON-FICTION

    1. Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression and the Unexpected Solutions by Johann Hari – 5 stars
    2. To Shake the Sleeping Self: A Journey from Oregon to Patagonia, and a Quest for a Life with No Regret by Jedidah Jenkins – 5 stars
    3. Staying: A Memoir by Jessie Cole – 5 stars
    4. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson – 4 stars
    5. The Plant-Based Solution: A Vegan Cardiologist’s Plan to Save Your Life and the Planet by Joel K. Kahn – 4 stars
    6. The Great Spring: Writing, Zen, and This Zigzag Life by Natalie Goldberg – 4 stars
    7. The Hidden School: Return of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman – 4 stars
    8. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organising by Marie Kondo – 4 stars
    9. The Alzheimer’s Solution: A Revolutionary Guide to How You Can Prevent and Reverse Memory Loss by Dean Sherzai – 4 stars
    10. Shining: The Story of a Lucky Man by Abdi Aden – 4 stars
    11. Random Life by Judy Horacek – 3 stars
    12. 8 Keys to Forgiveness by Robert Enright – 3 stars
    13. Living as a River: Finding Fearlessness in the Face of Change by Bodhipaksa – 3 stars
    14. The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi – 3 stars
    15. Eat Pray Love Made Me Do It: Life Journeys Inspired by the Best-selling Memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert – 3 stars
    16. 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works by Dan Harris – 3 stars
    17. The Longevity Diet: Discover the New Science Behind Stem Cell Activation and Regeneration to Slow Aging, Fight Disease, and Optimize Weight by Valter Longo – 3 stars
    18. Lovelands by Debra Campbell – 3 stars
    19. Unequaled: Tips for Building a Successful Career Through Emotional Intelligence by James A. Runde – 3 stars
    20. Eat to Live: The Revolutionary Formula for Fast and Sustained Weight Loss by Joel Fuhrman M.D. – 3 stars
    21. The Vegan Starter Kit by Neal D. Barnard – 3 stars
    22. OMD: Swap One Meal a Day to Save the Planet and Your Health by Suzy Amis Cameron – 3 stars
    23. Marcia Langton: Welcome to Country by Marcia Langton – 1 stargoodreads_challenge_2018-pic02

    Co-Creating Experiences of The Book

    Or … event planning at public libraries.

    The Cause

    Participatory learning is not a new concept, but becoming widely adopted as a valid way to engage with communities. Public libraries have used this approach in recent years to highlight their value and to support literacy development in our diverse local populations.

    Libraries have great books and so much more, but there is a prevalent need to let people know this. One great method is to extend the power of the book by inviting authors to come along to provide further explanation, context, ideas, and personal story. This enriches the experience of the book for the library users and hopefully actively supports the IFLA credos about intellectual freedom, inclusion, fostering creative and critical thinking.

    031-IMG_0760

    Kylie Ladd and Liane Moriarty at Frankston Library 2015 (photo by me)

    The Sponsor

    The sponsor is the governing organisation that provides the required funds to deliver these events, with a mandate towards social inclusion, public wellbeing, and community participation. The process can be upheld through regular checks and balances,  reporting, and goodwill and integrity.

    The Organiser

    In this description, that would be me, and I have a process, a small team, venues, a budget, and no shortage of ideas. I am naturally organised and with project planning experience from my Industrial Design background, I love a good project plan. The main tool for my process is a spread-sheet in a multitude of variations. I can be juggling anywhere from 5 to 15 events and promotions simultaneously, all at varying stages in the process. I love a good Gantt chart but have simplified to a simple timeline. I prepare a communication plan for my team and other essential documents such as a media release.

    The Speaker

    Booked Out Agency serves as a perfect partner as a provider of authors as speakers. What a wonderful and empowering mechanism for authors to be able to extend their work! They are my first resource when I am planning to fill my events calendar.

    Having found a speaker and agreed to the time, fees, etc. it is up to the speaker to engage with the audience.

    Authors who are not well-known or just launching their first book can try to jump onto the speakers route through public libraries. This does require a bit of self-promotion and leg-work by the author to make the connection and pitch their worth to the library events organiser (me). Fees for speaking will be much less depending on what is expected and agreed. Sometimes free use of space in exchange for the speaking event can be a viable way for an unknown author to get into this field.

    Once ‘on stage’ it is entirely up to the speaker/author to engage the audience. Not every speaker fully realises this opportunity provided to them. It is a special and unique platform to have the spotlight, to speak their truths, to say their piece. Some waste it. Some don’t inspire. Some are self-indulgent. Some are just inexperienced. Some can write eloquently but not be able to speak to an audience well at all. It is a performance to some degree. Expert speakers can talk underwater – for hours. Great speakers inspire, are humble, and authentic. Some just have one great idea that can hold an audience spellbound for an hour. 

    The Audience

    People have to feel inspired into action to come along to a hear a speaker. Sometimes popularity or notoriety is all it takes to fill a space with eager attendees. They come with expectations, wanting to get ‘something’ from their investment of time and/or ticket price.

    It is a serendipitous outcome. My attitude is based on the idea that whoever is in the room was meant to be there. Any particular mix of people will shape the event into the unique experience that it is. Any messages shared by the speaker or the attendees are expressed for all to hear and learn from.

    The Results

    This past year I have been successful in attracting people into the library who are not our regulars, or even library users. Does this translate into new memberships and more loans? Probably not. That is part of the aim but not in an overt or pushy manner. The hope is they will see the benefits and come back soon.

    The results are dynamic, unique and engaging. Hopefully it reflects the objective: that we engage with the people in our community to inspire learning, support literacy development, encourage freedom of thought with the ability to think critically. We hope to instil this love of libraries into everyone of us.

    Other Explanations

    While researching the topic to see what others say about this ‘occupation’, I came across two descriptions that I particularly like:

    #glamblogweekly